I often see the people who complain and become irritated about the things that they can’t control. I read somewhere that our life becomes easier when we are able to distinguish between two things;
- The things that are under our control
- The things that are beyond our control
Things that are under our control can be changed, but the things that are beyond our control cannot be. A thought came to our mind to wake up early — and we can change our routines as well as habits. A flight is delayed because of weather — no amount of complaining will end a storm. You can change your behavior, but you can’t make other people like you. There are so many things in life that we can’t change and are beyond our control. Yet, we complain about them and become agitated. I read a few literature of Narcotics Anonymous and I was amazed to read the Serenity Prayer; and found that recovery community practice it everyday. The prayer goes like this;
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.”
If we can focus on making it clear what sorts of things are under our control and what things are not; we will not only be at peace but also have a distinct advantage over other people who fail to realize they are fighting a battle they can’t win because such things are beyond their control.
So it would be rational to distinguish the problems between those under and beyond our control, take the initiative to change the things that are under our control, and accept the things that are beyond our control. It seems simple, but I bet it will do miracles in life.
I genuinely do understand when clients say they’re looking for a change, but don’t know what it is yet or how to achieve it. Because I have been there, done that and thankfully was lucky enough to walk away to now be doing a job where I never have to think “Thank God it’s Friday (TGIF).”
